A Fashion Reminder

I’m wearing an Adan Lippes dress rented from Rent the Runway, with Nike sneakers, blazer from H&M, baseball cap from Everlane, Nisolo heels, and a belt from Target.

My love for pairing sneakers with a dress began when I was a sophomore in high school. I was styling some items; pair of small-flare jeans (skinny jeans weren’t a thing yet), a pair of gray Converse with pink trim (converses were the shoes to wear), a red thrifted fine-knit cardigan, and an abstract floral tube top dress with an asymmetrical hem were laid out on my bed and I knew I had something. This outfit felt fun and cool. I still remember the joy of coming up with this style on my own and feeling that it was very much me. I also remember the looks and comments that came at my self-expression. I carpooled with my cousins to school. On that school day when I met my cousins at their car, one cousin gave me a disapproving look and asked me what I was wearing. The other cousin joined in agreeing that dresses, jeans, and sneakers don’t go together. Ah, pamilya! I gave my cousins a “whatever!” but a nervous feeling began to grow in my stomach, an anxiety brought on by criticism of my budding fashion sense. However, I held on to the confidence I felt when I wore this outfit alone in my room, with joy looking back at me in the mirror. Their criticism told me I was different and that difference wasn’t okay. Throughout that school day I was met with more criticism. Even our school’s football coach had something to say in front of our entire gym class, “The jeans are too casual for that kind of dress. If the dress were casual, then I could see it maybe working.” I felt slightly vindicated in my fashion choices when a few months later, I would see in the pages of Vogue, celebrities wearing dresses with jeans. But I didn’t need my pamilya’s approval, or the football coaches, nor Vogue’s. I made this fashion choice without anyone’s consideration, only my own.

I share this story with you because my caption to the Instagram post of this outfit carried some doubt as to whether pairing sneakers and dresses were still in style or if it ages me, revealing my millennial-ness. Many of you commented with compliments that you love how I styled this Aden Lippes dress. Hey, maybe you’re all millennials like me! Lily Allen was our sneakers and dress queen! I appreciate you. Your compliment was a reminder that my love for fashion and expressing myself through clothes started because it brought me joy, not because I received validation from others. I didn't receive validation then and oftentimes, I still come across people who look at me with that same disapproving or questioning look my cousins gave me. Yes, even in this time when street style has a legitimate category in fashion, some people are shocked by others' daringness to be expressive. So I leave you with this reminder, as well as myself – dress in the way that makes you happy. Give space to your joy, not others’ questioning and criticisms. 

Hope you all have a lovely week of beautiful weather, whatever hemisphere you’re in. I woke up to a sunny day, but with 23 mph winds with a wind chill of 35. So, it’s another week of combining spring and winter fashion. Happy fashion styling!